STORIES TO INSPIRE

Valerie's Story

In 1975, when Valerie was five and her brothers nine and 13, my husband was diagnosed with MS. It was a diagnosis that he could not accept. From the first day, he stopped being a father and a husband and completely gave up on life. He died 14 years later.

The children grew up with a father in the house, but he was never really there for them. The boys were active in sports, but he never saw them play. He missed seeing Valerie, who had become an accomplished dancer at age 10 and was performing with a local ballet company professionally.

Michael went on to college and later married; John graduated and started a good job. At 16, Valerie traveled to Great Britain on a dance tour. She was a finalist in the Miss Teenage Philadelphia Pageant, a member of the school orchestra and student government, and kept her grades up while keeping a part-time job. She went on to attend college with scholarships and grants. As an intern majoring in therapeutic recreation, Valerie worked part time with ventilator-dependent children.

Right before Christmas during her senior year she complained of vertigo. The doctor gave her some pills and after a few weeks she felt better. Then in February she lost the vision in one eye and was admitted to the hospital.

The first things she asked me to bring were her school books so she could continue her schoolwork while she was there. That night the doctor called our family into the hall and told us that Valerie had multiple sclerosis.

Valerie was my beautiful, intelligent, talented daughter; I could not believe this was happening again. When we went back into the room she insisted that we tell her what the doctor said. All I could think of was that she would picture herself like her father and completely give up.

Unknown to us, being in the medical field, Valerie was pretty sure that she had MS and was holding it from us. When we confirmed her thoughts she said, "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'm not going to be like my father. I'm going to do everything I planned to do with my life."

The first thing she asked her doctor was if she could have children. He told her she could, but that she may need help to care for them. She went back to school on Monday, to her internship and then her part-time job at night. Several weeks later she had another exacerbation and was admitted to the hospital again. She told the doctors that she had to be out in three days because she had an interview for a scholarship.

In May she graduated with honors with a degree in therapeutic recreation as a therapeutic recreation specialist and received the only two scholarships given by her department. With her scholarship money, she attended nursing school during the day and worked at Children's Seashore House with ventilator-dependent children at night.

Never once did she feel sorry for herself or shed a tear. Her best friends tell me that she never dwells on her illness and people never believe it when told because she is so vibrant and full of life. Although she does not hide the fact that she has MS, it is not something that rules her life.

In May of 1995, Valerie graduated from the Thomas Jefferson University School of Nursing, passed her boards, and started working full time with her beloved ventilator-dependent children.

On June l, 1996 Valerie-Lynn Valle, certified therapeutic recreation specialist/registered pediatric nurse and Stephen Paul Gelovich, MD were married. Through his tears his vows to her were that he had seen the sun, but never felt its warmth, he had seen the birds, but never heard their song until he had met her. He told her that he hoped that he could make her life as happy and complete as she had made his.

She told him that she knew that her father was her guardian angel and had sent him to her when she had given up on love, that she loved him for many reasons, some being his compassion and sincerity and for how he held her and took care of her when she was sick.

They realize that the future can be uncertain, and Stephen, being a doctor, knows what can happen. They love each other very much and say that they will handle whatever the future has in store for them. I thank God every day for giving her the courage and determination to accept her fate and for sending her Stephen. While we never know what life has in store for us, my daughter has taught me that we must live for today and never to let anything prevent us from achieving our dreams. With her attitude and faith, Valerie is succeeding and realizing her dreams.

She continued to work at Children's Seashore House in Philadelphia; her devotion to these severely handicapped children was so great. The children she took care of were long-term care patients who were born with underdeveloped lungs. They arrive as infants, and for some, the only parents they know are the nurses. Sometimes they stay at Children's Seashore House until they can be placed in a long-term care facility for life, which is usually when they are about six or seven. The nurses become very attached to them and treat them as if they were their own. When one of Valerie's "kids" left, if they are placed in a facility close by, she would visit them on her day off.

Before her pregnancy, once a week after work she taught dance to children with Downs Syndrome and hearing impairments. She had to stop because her dream to become a mother had come true.

Valerie had a wonderful pregnancy. She was not due until June 20th, but while at work almost two weeks earlier, she went into labor. Valerie drove herself home and called her husband. On June 8, 1999, Valerie and Stephen had a beautiful baby girl, Alyssa Ann. Afterward, Valerie said labor was a "piece of cake" and was already talking about having another baby.

Valerie is determined to live as normal a life as possible and so far that is happening. Valerie, Steve and Alyssa moved to Florida in October of 2001. On March 28, 2004, she gave birth to Kayla. Valerie now works two nights a week in a group home for ventilator-dependent babies.

Valerie was chosen to carry the Olympic torch in the Philadelphia run on December 23, 2002 and was one of five winners in the Redbook/Chevrolet Women of Uncompromising Strength Awards. She also has a Pedal Partner who rides in her name at the MS Annual Bike Ride, raising money for MS.

Valerie is a courageous, dedicated young woman who is always there to help someone in need. She has received glowing praises from her professors, employers, and peers. She is determined to not let MS take over her life. In the meantime, she devotes her time to helping others.

No matter what a person has, an illness, a loss, a disappointment, etc., he or she must realize attitude is one of the most important things that will help conquer his or her problems. With faith and determination, miracles happen. Just ask Valerie.

— By Kathleen Valle

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